Saturday, March 24, 2012

Conquer Through Love

At work I take leave to scratch my head, I

Joke with the men, and belittle the thoughts

Of pesky philosophers.  How could they

That have never done a single days work

Have ever begun to consider life?

We smile, grin at such suppositions,

For we view them as superstitions;  to

Grand to truly believe. Yet there I stand

And all at once my friends disappear from

My sights. Oh how could I have not seen you

Standing there, your long hair streaming behind

You in the wind, your eyes clear as the stars;

How long have you been standing there without

So much as a word from your lips? You turn,

And for a moment I have a mind to

Reach out, call your name, seek forgiveness for

My offense; then I am brought back, my mind

Is no longer my own, for I have lost

It in the collective of man's laughter's. They

Look up in amusement, wondering that

I should look confused; for a moment I

Embarrassed with shame and confusion frown

With the uncertainties that come with love.

Then I throw back my head, I smile, and

With my best joke I put them at ease so

That I may escape from their snares. Yet you

turns back again, your hurt now sorrow, in

Pain most bitter you leave my presence. What,

Can I have been so foolish to contend

With working men for attention that I

Should abuse the beliefs of my love? Shall

I sit back in laughter and derision

For the sake of one day's farthing of my

Own contentment? All at once I stand up,

Mind racing, whirling in the tempest of

Regret; they mock, and jostle me, with their sly grins.

As I begin to walk away they reach

Out with claws of iron, pulling me back down

Into the nightmare that waits bellow. The

Ground disappears, the table falls into

The black abyss that has appeared; unto

This black abyss must I go unless help

Arrive, this whirling tempest of hatred,

Derived from my very words. To think, a
Moment before these same words, my friends, were

My life; now seize me by the hand and will

Not relent until I submit to the

Punishment in store. Gasping for fear
That I shall die I look above once more,

Cry out my regret, and with bitter tears

Apologize to the one I love. Yet,

Am I dead already? Could the tempest

So near be deafened by silence so strong?

For a moment convinced of my death I

Lower my head in grief to repeat my

Apology, now said to late But then

I find myself again on the ground, my

Helmet on, and my friends above me; is

That concern in their eyes, proclaimed by their

Words? I search the ground with my hands, clinging
To the mass as though I should fly into

The sky at a moments notice, I set

Myself firmly. Their protests I hear well,

But for fear resist. Then I can tell,

Some new presence is among them; I hear

That voice which I had lost so long ago,

Feel her hand upon my back, her breath I

Disbelieve for fear of disappointment.

Yet in spite of myself I turn, for my

Heart's desire outweighs my fear, convicts

Me so strongly that I must obey, as

The sea obeys the pull of the moon,

So is my will to see that one small boon;

Her smile. Shall I remain firm when she

Beckons to me, as an elephant shall

Never forget? I turn my head from mud

Found here bellow, and gaze upon the sun,

Whereupon I lose all control. She reaches

Out her hand to mine; I respond in kind.

Though fear will always cause me some distress,

I know that Love shall conquer my duress. 

Conquer Through Love, (C) Luke Bennette

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